Hipstergrammers

Why isn't Lisp more popular? It's clearly the most powerful language.

Tue, 03 Jan 2012 11:56:05 -0800

Clearly, however the cogs in the corporate enterprise software-industrial complex can’t understand it, so it will never be popular.

That’s great news for us.

is scala just java for hipsters?

Fri, 30 Dec 2011 13:20:36 -0800

It’s SCALAble, of course it’s for hipstergrammers. But it’s not JUST for hipstergrammers.

How much VC funding can I accept for my startup before I've sold out?

Fri, 30 Dec 2011 13:17:01 -0800

In the hipstergrammer world, NOT accepting a ridiculous amount of funding is selling out.

See the irony?

Do you block on your async calls just to be ironic?

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 13:30:12 -0800

I think the best unintentional Node.js irony is summarized here: http://www.infoq.com/articles/multi-core-node-js

Do the best JS developers use jQuery?

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:53:58 -0800

No. They use Ember.js.

Should I consider Objective-C a weird, archaic language, a wonderful revolutionary tool to create localization-based social apps for iOS or too mainstream given the success of Mac OS?

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:53:40 -0800

It’s a weird, archaic language for making location-based social apps for iOS. Since it’s so mainstream right now, you can only use it if you pretentiously brag about how you used it years ago to build apps for your TI-83.

Have you tried the Go language? It's kinda an edgy new language, but it's by Google which is pretty much THE MAN now. I'm torn. At least it's BSD licensed.

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:52:18 -0800

Go is pretty cool, but unfortunately it doesn’t cross-compile to JS so it’s pretty much useless for any application.

Hipstergrammers don't search with Google, it's totally mainstream. They only use duckduckgo, except when they're using Bing ironically.

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:49:09 -0800

The most hipstergrammer search engine is, of course, Blekko.

Sorry, just a little rant. I've been hired by this pseudo-luddite to put a menu for his cafeteria on his website. I've suggested node.js, he told me: "what, the other guy just used HTML and everything worked fine". Why doesn't people care about scalability?

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:48:41 -0800

It’s obvious that Heroku is your only hosting option, since hipstergrammers will never use a simple web host. Unfortunately, I do not think they are HTML-compatible, so it looks like you’ll need to use Node.js after all! Yay!

Photo

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:44:18 -0800

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Wed, 28 Dec 2011 10:40:59 -0800

What's your favorite operator?

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 00:06:54 -0800

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comma_operator of course!

Do you use riak? I hear it runs on erlang which is totally retro.

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 21:18:53 -0800

Riak, like Node.js, is appropriate for every application. That’s because I change the requirements of my application to fit the tool, like a true hipstergrammer.

Node.js Node.js Node.js

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 21:18:15 -0800

Oh man, I love Arcade Fire too! Well, at least until they went mainstream.

Ditto rails.

I hear Rails is too mainstream. What other frame works fit my ironic style?

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 21:17:34 -0800

That’s a great question! You should probably do the following:

1. Implement a Smalltalk-to-CoffeeScript compiler in any language not in the TIOBE top languages. It’s important that this step is incomplete, slow, and largely useless.
2. Write your own Smalltalk web framework, compile it to CoffeeScript, run on Node.js.
3. Make a screencast that shows something that trivializes real-world application development, like a blog, TODO list or wiki, and gloss over any real-world problems it may have with words like “scalability” and “data-driven decision making.”

should I use flash for my navigation buttons?

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 21:14:08 -0800

Flash has over 90% adoption, which makes it way too mainstream. Use ActiveX — it’s the PBR of client-side web technology.

should I use YUI for my next project?

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 17:48:37 -0800

You should probably use Backbone.js and CoffeeScript and JQuery

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Tue, 27 Dec 2011 11:49:21 -0800

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Tue, 27 Dec 2011 11:47:52 -0800

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Tue, 27 Dec 2011 11:45:52 -0800